MISS.AGE❤️

SCARS Waking up to a new sunrise Looking back from the other side I can see now with open eyes Darkest water and deepest pain I wouldn't trade it for anything 'Cause my brokenness brought me to you And these wounds are a story you'll use So I'm thankful for the scars 'Cause without them I wouldn't know your heart And I know they'll always tell of who you are So forever I am thankful for the scars Now I'm standing in confidence With the strength of your faithfulness And I'm not who I was before No, I don't have to fear anymore So I'm thankful for the scars 'Cause without them I wouldn't know your heart And I know they'll always tell of who you are So forever I am thankful for the scars I can see, I can see How you delivered me In your hands, in your feet I found my victory. Beautiful Lyrics by I AM THEY. Have a blessed Sabbath Day love and blessings MISS.AGE https://open.spotify.com/track/72B1Omo2...

Things that a Widow wants everyone to know:  1. Widows are not monolithic. There is no one-size-fits-all when it comes to losing a loved one. All losses are not the same, nor do we all grieve the same way. So don’t assume you know how we are feeling. Trust me, half the time we don’t even know how we feel. Or even how we are supposed to feel. 2. Grieving isn’t a competition. Please don’t compare my loss with your neighbor’s or your sister’s or even your own. As writer and widow Laurie Burrows Grad says, “Comparing grief is a totally useless cause. This is not a competition. The grief we feel has its own voice and should not be compromised by comparisons.” Comparing grief is something you bump into a lot at grief groups. Who hurts the most: The widow who spent 50 years with her childhood sweetheart or the young widow left with three kids to raise on her own? Why even go there? What’s the prize? 3. Widowhood can be deadly, but it isn’t contagious. ...

Miles away from the love of my life. Time keeps ticking away. But my mind is back to that very day. This picture speaks volume. Be Strong YOU CAN DO THIS. Love y'all - MISS.AGE 

My Husband's Love; The easiest way to harm a relationship is to look at a person and think, You will never change. Thankfully, God always believes we can change, and therefore, He continues to work with us. The first YEAR of my marriage to Adrian, my behavior was at its worst. I had never been in a healthy relationship and honestly had no idea how to behave in one. My thoughts about marriage, and what to expect from a relationship, were all warped and unrealistic. When I ask ed  Adrian Taualii  what enabled him to stick with me, he says, “I knew that God could change you.” Wow! Adrian’s belief that God could change me was a key factor in my healing. I only felt love from him. Sadly, most of the time I couldn’t receive it, but that didn’t stop him from being who he was. He kept offering love, and he remained joyful. God keeps giving even if we have not yet learned how to receive, and we can learn to do the same thing in our relationships with other people. I have lear...

Trust My heart has been broken a good number of times before. I remember one night, after nights of crying and mornings of puffy eyes, I recalled what God’s Word says in every situation, pray with thanksgiving. I locked myself in the bathroom, looked at myself in the mirror, and with all of my heart I thanked God in between sniffs and sobs. “Lord, thank You,” I said. “I don’t understand what’s happening and it’s really painful, but thank You for whatever reasons Y ou’re allowing this to happen.” When I woke up the following morning, it was like God has made my heart new and I have leaped forward to moving on. During my season of mourning the death of my amazing husband, I was brought back to the same scripture. Even when it didn’t make sense, and even when I really didn’t feel like it, I stepped out in faith and obedience and thanked God in my prayers. Oh, it was tough! But it’s true that when we do, God’s peace will put us at ease. Beyond comfort, it will guard our hearts and ...

Stand Strong and Don’t Give Up. I remember the first night without my husband Age and that I almost gave up. I had been doing so much better with the depression and with my wrecked life. I assumed I was okay, but I was not. That night, I almost lost the desire to fight. Curling down into a fetal position, I felt the darkness sinking in. Tears spilled over each eyelid and fiercely rolled down my cheeks and onto my neck. I felt a tightness in my chest, like something heavy was  pressing against it. “It’s too much,” I thought to myself. “It’s too much.” It seemed as if I was no longer breathing, and why should I try? It was better this way. Someone would find me in the morning. I would die a natural death, depressed and alone. Through it all, God will give you the strength to keep going. You can’t give up because that’s just not the way you are supposed to roll. You must be persistent and be obedient in your pursuit of fulfilling your purpose. This is your life that you are ...

Words of Life - Relationships: I met a woman who was beat down, defeated, low self-esteem and felt there no reason to live. I knew the Lord directed my steps to meet her today. It only takes someone to breathe positive, encouragement and life words too her to believe she can do it. Life is worth fighting for regardless the circumstances you are facing. Your level of effectiveness in any relationship will be in direct proportion to the amount of care and concern you have for the people in that relationship. Only when you love people and demonstrate their value to you, will you have a rewarding connection. Everyone needs reassurance of their worth. As you daily interact with those around you, remind yourself that each person you meet has encountered waves of criticism, condemnation and inferiority. You can change their outlook and their demeanor with your words. Your expressions of encouragement can be the catalyst that creates lasting change in their lives and the inspiration...

Do you care What People Think about you? I can answer that question....No I don’t care, what others think about me or say about me. It’s not my problem to worry about what others think or say about me. It shouldn’t be your problem too. Be strong and Love Yourself. So many insecurities come from a fear of what others think. This is another tactic of the enemy. He knows by nature, we are selfish individuals and he is very good at capitalizing on this weakness to take us off track and hold us back from living freely. Too often, this fear of what others think comes directly from a problem of judgment in ourselves. We do or don’t do certain things because we fear being judged by others, only because we judge others too harshly. When we are self-centered everything anyone says to us is filtered through our insecurity and we can hear things that were never said. When we pass unfair judgments on others, we condemn ourselves. (Romans 2:1) If we had the knowledge and strength to ...

It's so hard to lose the one you love To finally have to say goodbye You try to be strong but the pain keeps holdin' on And all that you can do is cry Deep within your heart you know it's time to move on When the fairy tale that you once knew is gone When the last tear drop falls I'll still be holdin' on to all of our memories And all of what used to be When the last tear drop falls I will stand tall And know that you're here with me in my heart When the last tear drop falls So now I'm alone and life keeps movin' on But my destination still unknown, oh yeah Will there be a time when I'll fall in love again? When I was meant to walk these streets alone If there was just one wish I could be granted here tonight It would be to have you right back by my side When the last tear drop falls I'll still be holdin' on to all of our memories And all of what used to be Now it's time for me to find my happiness again And...

CHANGE  How’s life? Has life been hard? Do you feel like giving up? I hope this encourages you to keep going!! REAL TALK: It’s been 2 years and 1 month from today that my husband went to Heaven. It’s been a 2 years and 1 month I have been a widow and my life changed completely. It has changed me and everything in my life. Going through the process of losing a husband changed me mentally, physically and emotionally. Since Adrian passed I have moved away from what we built together, new place to live, moving different states, changing careers, moving to a different country, gaining weight, losing weight, getting money, losing money, losing friends, saying goodbye to family, in-laws and the list goes on. It was like I had to learn to eat, walk and breath again. A future ahead of me that I was force into that I didn’t want. During this process I had a lot of thoughts running through my head like, I didn’t signed up for this kinder life??? What the hell am I goi...

Don’t look Back! "Do not look behind you nor stay anywhere in the plain." Genesis 19:17. When I look back at my life, I am so thankful that God brought me out of many situations that would have only resulted in my destruction had I stayed there. In the moment of having to leave behind people, possessions and relationships we hold close and dear to us may seem like the most challenging thing to do. But when you put your trust in the One who knows best; the present pain will ev entually turn into the greatest gain in life. Lot's wife's treasures were so buried in the city she had to leave behind that she was not willing to trust God with the future. The Bible tells us that as she was leaving the city she "Looked back" and was turned into a pillar of salt. The truth about looking back constantly and living in the past is that it will drain the very life from you. Let us heed the warning of God and make sure our heart is following him. Don’t look b...

Forgiveness. Can you Forgive? Many of us carry around the weight of unforgiveness. Some because we don’t know how to forgive. Others because we are unwilling to let go of what has been said and done to us. Forgiveness doesn’t mean what was done was ok, but unforgiveness only offers us bitterness, anger, hate, and pride. If we’re not careful, our past hurts can shape our lives and destroy us from the inside out. To live in the freedom that Christ has for us, we have to learn how to forgi ve and shed the heaviness that comes from holding onto our pain. While our natural tendency is to push away the discomfort and challenge of forgiving, as Christ followers, we’re called to lean into it. Working through the things in our past with God is what enables us to move forward. Unfortunately, it’s not a one-time process. Forgiveness is a constant part of our lives. It’s something we have to work on every day as new offenses happen. Relationships at work require grace, so we’re...

Standing Strong in Faith - Nothing Makes Sense. My husband and soul mate passed away. Now I am a widow in my early 30’s. I’ve moved back to my parents home, with nothing but the clothes on my back. I’m actually came back more broke as I was when I left my family. I have no children No car No savings No money No assets Nothing I have nothing. But through all of that, Im okay because the Lord is with me!!! I have is a grateful heart, a heart of praise and a faithful heart. I do not feel defeated. I believe that God has a mighty plan for me. The moral of this is - It’s easy to go through life wondering how things are going to work out. But you don’t have to worry about your future. Your life is divinely orchestrated. God has determined the end from the beginning. He is behind the scenes not only directing your steps, but directing the steps of the people you need. He’s not just in control of your life, He’s in control of all your circumstances. You can live from a p...

Sleeplessness! Whilst emotions run about my head in an endless parade, Most empty, whilst others weigh me down below, Run, hide, leave, fly free, I dare not obey them, for they shall lead me to my demise, Untimely, yet fate claims otherwise. They tell me I’m too young to understand. Are they sure of what they say? My maturity is beyond my age, or so I’m told, It may grow with me, or merely just be put in bold, This is all my mind can hold, All I can bare. Love turns to ashes, With all that I wish I could say, I dream it were still here, The ghost by my side, With all I hold dear, I dream it’s still here. Phantom, it stares into my soul, I dream of escape, When I was it disappears, So easily, I feel it slipping away, Every night. See the truth lying in their eyes, The truth that they buried inside, The fire, seething within, Burning your heart, Your very soul, If only these scars would heal. Can’t sleep, Restless, Can’t stop thinking  and Mind goi...

Dearest Age, Happy Two Years in Heaven. This past two years, life hasn’t been the easiest. I was heartbroken & confused. We both are eager to do God’s will & I’m thankful to God for leading me to you. It isn’t easy, but God makes everything better. Our lives have changed. I never thought I would say goodbye to you so soon. The moment you asked me to be your wife and I said yes, our world changed. I won’t forget how your face lit up. You were ready to tell the entire world. We prayed & He answered us. We were going to be one. However, God had other plans for you and my future. You probably thought if you would be a good dad or a grandfather one day. Our marriage adventure was short, but these many years are full of so much joy I will forever be thankful for. We won’t be able to hold each other on Earth, but this only makes me want to go to heaven to see you. I wonder how it would be in Heaven. I was so excited to see you as a father to our future children. You already...

Hello Blessings, This cycle has some true facts - However my grieving didn't go in that order. Acceptance - That is a challenge. My encouragement is not to worry about what others tell you how to grieve. There is no shortcut in grieving. You grieve how you want to grieve. There is no right or wrong way to mourn. Stay true to yourself and believe that you are strong and capable. MISSAGE❤️.

Denial. After I left the hospital that day when Age passed.... I went to our home. Our things were left where they were when we left for our vacation. It felt like nothing happened. My body was numb, exhausted  and my heart was racing. I felt like I had no strength to cry. I had thoughts running in my mind like; “Is this real? OMG? I’m not a widow I’m too young? What is happening? Did this happened? No not my Age? This isn’t real? This can be happening? Age isn’t dead? NO it’s not real? I finally convinced myself that Age was out and he was coming home soon. Ive decided I’ll just sleep in my lounge room and wait for him. As I was trying to deny the fact he wasn’t back. I tried everything in my power to not believe that this was happening. I avoid going into our bedroom and stayed in my lounge room for days. It’s was hard for me to talk to God or anyone that night. I wanted to isolate myself so no one could reach out to me or make a fuss out of me. It started to get rea...

The Worst Day of My Life – Let The Trials Begin; My husband died suddenly on the 20/10/2017. Adrian Taualii was not sick he was healthy in fact there was no signs of him being ill. Adrian planned a getaway for his family and I for my birthday at Cowes in Victoria Australia afterwards he wanted to take me to spend my 33rd birthday in Sydney with my family. We checked into our beach house in Cowes on the 16/10/19 around midday. Everything was great we laughed and enjoyed ourselves. The next day 17/10/17 seemed normal, Adrian was his normal joking self. That afternoon Adrian told me he wanted to go and relax and have a power nap, Adrian woke up during that night told me he wasn't feeling well. I told Age we should see a doctor now. But Age being the man he is he told me he should be fine in the morning. If not we agreed to  see a doctor the next morning. The next morning on 18/10/17 - Adrian was not well he refused to see a doctor that morning. Age wanted to sleep. I was s...

Hey Blessings, Suicide attempts! There’s one thing I hold close to my heart is my Faith in The Lord. Without Jesus in my life, I don’t think I’ll be here. My strength comes from Jesus. Yes God’s love kept me from committing suicide. Real talk the thought did cross my mind. Grief takes you to the most darkest places at times. Let me tell you The Enemy is strong, He is out to get you. The Enemy is out to Steal,Kill and Destroy. But the love I have for the Lord, my family, and friends was deeper then ending my life. Just because you ain’t feeling life remember who loves you that is in the land of living. “Love Conquers All” For someone who does not have a relationship with Jesus I encourage you to open your heart. If not it’s okay all in Gods timing. Everyone has a choice there’s no judgement here. This scripture below was one I held onto when the going gets tough. MISSAGE❤️

Hey Y’all, My Name is Lakena aka MISSAGE❤️, I became a widow at age 32. My loving and AMAZING husband Adrian aka AGE passed away on the 21/10/2017. My life has never been the same since. I have created this blog to share my life as a young widow. I wanted to share how and what I did to cope through this crazy and hard journey as a young widow. My blog is also for anyone who has loss a love one or a friend. The whole purpose for blogging is to help build Love, Forgiveness, Grace, Hope and Strength to others who are suffering from grieving - to keep living on and to not give up a good fight. I hope this page gives you peace and love. Much love and God Bless to you all MISSAGE❤️